The Crabbit Old Woman - A True Story

The Crabbit Old Woman

This is a true story right from the heart of England. Get your tissues ready!

When an old lady (unknown) died in her geriatric ward of a hospital in England, it appeared she had nothing left of value.
The nurse packing up her possessions found this poem. The quality impressed the staff so much that copies were distributed to all the nurses in the hospital.
This poem then later went on to appear in the Christmas edition of “Beacon House News”, a magazine of the Northern Ireland Mental Health Association. This was the Lady’s bequest for posterity.

What do you see nurse, what do you see?
What are you thinking when you look at me?
A crabbit old woman,
Not very wise,
Uncertain of habit with far away eyes,
Who dribbles her food, and makes no reply,
Then you say in a loud voice -
“I do wish you would try”
Who seems not to notice the things that you do,
and forever is losing a stocking or shoe,
Unresisting or not, lets you do as you will,
With bathing of feeding, the long day to fill.
Is that what you’re thinking, is that what you see?
Then open your eyes nurse, you’re not looking at me.
I’ll tell you who I am, as I sit here so still,
As I move at your bidding,
As I eat at your will.
I’m a small child of ten, with a father and mother,
And brothers and sisters who love one another.
A girl of sixteen, with wings on her feet;
dreaming that soon, a lover she’ll meet.
A bride soon at twenty, my heart gives a leap,
Remembering the vows that I promised to keep.
At twenty-five,
I have young,
Who need me to build a secure and happy home.
A woman of 30,
My young now grow fast,
Bound together with ties that forever should last.
At forty,
My young ones have grown up and gone,
My man is beside me to see I don’t mourn,
At fifty, once more…
Babies play ‘round my knees;
Again we know children,
My loved ones and me.
Dark days are upon me,
My husband is dead.
I look at the future,
I shudder with dread.
For my young are all rearing,
Young of their own,
And I think of the years and the love I have known.
I am an old woman now,
Nature is cruel,
‘Tis her jest to make old age look like a fool.
The body, it crumbles,
Grace and vigour depart,
There is now a stone where I once had a heart.
But inside this old carcass,
A young girl still dwells,
And now and again,
My battered heart swells.
I remember the joys,
I remember the pain,
And I am loving and living life over again.
I think of the years, all too few,
Gone too fast,
And accept the stark fact,
That nothing can last.
So open your eyes nurses,
Open, and see…
Not a “Crabbit Old Woman”,
Look closer,
See me.

TIPS FOR STAYING COOL IN A HEATWAVE

Here are our top tips for staying cool in a heat wave!

Avoiding Heat-Related Illness

• Although some direct sun exposure is essential for the production of vitamin D make sure you keep out of the heat. Don’t spend long periods outside during the hottest time of the day, which is 11am–3pm. If you do go out, wear a hat and a light scarf and stay in the shade as much as possible.

• If you’re travelling by car or public transport, always take a bottle of water. 

• Avoid strenuous activity, and limit activities like housework and gardening to the early morning or evening.

• When inside, try to stay in the coolest parts of your home, especially when sleeping. Keep curtains and blinds closed in rooms that catch the sun. Remember that lights generate heat so turn them off when possible. Keep windows shut while it’s cooler inside than out. If it’s safe, you could leave a window open at night when it’s cooler. Fans can help sweat evaporate but don’t cool the air itself, so don’t rely on them to keep you well in the heat.

• Wear loose, lightweight, light-coloured, cotton clothing.

• Take cool baths or showers. 

• Splash your face with cool (not very cold) water, or place a damp cloth on the back of your neck to help you cool off.

• Drink lots of fluid – even if you aren’t thirsty. Aim for 6–8 glasses a day and more if it’s hot. If you usually rely on drinks with caffeine in them, such as tea, coffee or cola,  limit these and have water, fruit juice or decaf drinks instead. avoid alcohol as it can make dehydration worse. 

• Eat normally – even if you aren’t hungry, you need a normal diet to replace salt loss from sweating. In addition, try to have more salads and fruit, as these contain a lot of water.

Looking after your skin

It’s very important to ensure that your skin isn’t exposed to the sun for long periods, as this can lead to sunburn and make you more susceptible to skin cancer. Use sunscreen of at least SPF15 (sun protection factor) with four or five stars, applying it generously half an hour before and again shortly after going out in the sun. The sunscreen’s star rating shows its ability to protect your skin from damage and premature ageing. Reapply sunscreen at least every two hours and if you’ve been in water, reapply when you are dry. Get to know your skin type – whether you burn easily can influence the strength of sunscreen you should use and how long you can be outside in the sun without burning. Remember that anyone can develop skin cancer, so it’s important to protect your skin whatever your skin type. When you’re using sunscreen, apply it to your ears if they’re exposed, as well as your face, neck, arms, any bald patches on your head and any other uncovered part of your body. A hat will protect your head, face, ears and eyes. Wear sunglasses that have a CE mark, UV400 label or a statement that they offer 100 per cent UV (ultraviolet) protection. When the weather is hot, your skin may also feel drier than usual. Using moisturiser can help keep your skin healthy.

Sun Exposure and Vitamin D

Although it’s important to protect your skin, some direct exposure to the sun is essential for the production of vitamin D, so don’t avoid the sun altogether. Don’t let your skin redden or burn, but try to go outside every day without sunscreen for short periods from March to October, exposing at least your forearms and hands to the sun. Try to do this either once or twice a day. The more skin exposed, the better your chance of making enough vitamin D. There are some food sources of vitamin D – salmon, sardines and other oily fish, eggs and fortified spreads – but sunshine is the major source for most people. The Government recommends that some people take a vitamin D supplement of 10g daily, including people aged 65 and over. If you think you could be at risk of not getting enough vitamin D, particularly if you are housebound or cover your skin for cultural reasons, raise this with your GP. Always speak to your GP before starting to take a vitamin supplement or over-the counter medicine on a daily basis. If you have moles or brown patches on your skin, they usually remain harmless. However, if they bleed, or change

size, shape or colour, show them to your GP without delay.

Dehydration and overheating

Extreme heat and dry conditions can cause you to dehydrate and your body to overheat. It’s important to make sure you eat a balanced diet to help your body replace any salt you lose by sweating. You should also drink plenty of water, but may need to take particular care and speak to your GP or practice nurse if you’re taking medication that affects water retention. Watch out for certain signs – particularly for muscle cramps in your arms, legs or stomach, mild confusion, weakness or sleep problems. If you have any of these, rest in a cool place and drink plenty of fluids. Seek medical advice if your symptoms persist or worsen.

Heat Exhaustion

The symptoms of heat exhaustion include headaches, dizziness, nausea or vomiting, intense thirst, heavy sweating and a fast pulse. If you have any of these symptoms you must, if at all possible:

• find a cool place to lie down

• loosen tight clothes and remove any unnecessary clothing

• drink plenty of water or fruit juice

• sponge yourself with cool water or have a cool shower.

Your symptoms should improve within 30 minutes. If you’re

feeling better, but still have any concerns call NHS 111 or

your GP for advice. 

Heatstroke

Heatstroke can develop if heat exhaustion is left untreated – but it can also develop suddenly and without warning. The more severe symptoms of heatstroke include confusion, disorientation, seizures and loss of consciousness.

Heatstroke is a life-threatening condition. So if you or someone else shows symptoms:

• call 999 immediately, or if you have a community alarm, press the button on your pendant to call for help.

• while waiting for the ambulance, follow the advice given for heat exhaustion, but do not try to give fluids to anyone who is unconscious. 

‘I still enjoy the hot weather but I’m much more careful now. On hot days I only stay outside for a little while at a time.’ After Eva felt hot and dizzy in the garden one day, she started to take more care in the sun. ‘I’d never really thought sitting out in the sun could be a problem, until I was out for too long on a very hot day. I started to feel a bit dizzy and I had a headache, so I went back indoors. Luckily my neighbour was with me as we’d been sitting in the garden together, so she got me a glass of water. After that I felt a lot better. My neighbour wondered if I’d been dehydrated. ‘A lot of people think it doesn’t get warm enough in this country for us to need to take care, so they only look after themselves when they’re on holiday. But wherever you are you can get ill if you have too much sun, and you need to be careful even when the sky looks

hazy. I still enjoy the nice weather but I’m much more careful now. On hot days I only stay outside for a little while at a time, and if I don’t want to be cooped up indoors I just cover up and sit in the shade.’

What else can you do?

• If you live alone, consider asking a relative or friend to visit or phone to check that you’re not having difficulties during periods of extreme heat.

• If you know a neighbour who lives alone, check regularly that they are OK.

• If a heatwave is on its way or the weather is hot for several days, listen to local radio so that you know the latest advice for your area. Check for weather forecasts and temperature warnings on TV and radio, and online at ww.metoffice.gov.uk

• Bacteria on food can multiply quickly in hot weather, which increases the risk of food poisoning. When you buy chilled food, take it home in a cool bag and put it in your fridge as soon as you get home. You should also use a cool bag if you take food out for a picnic. Don’t leave food out in a warm room or in the sun.

• If you have breathing problems or a heart condition, your symptoms might get worse when it’s very hot. Contact your GP practice in advance for advice, to make sure you’re well prepared. 

The Jar Theory

A philosophy professor stood before his class and had some items in front of him. When the class began, he wordlessly picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar.

He then proceeded to fill the jar with golf balls.

“Is the jar full?” he asked his students. “Yes,” everyone responded.

The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly; The pebbles rolled into the areas between the golf balls.

“Is the jar full?” he asked again.The students responded with an unanimous: “Yes.”

The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course the sand filled up all the space left.

He asked once more: “Is the jar full?”. “Yes, of course,” everyone responded.

The professor then produced two beers from under the table and poured the entire content into the jar, filling the empty space between the sand.

Everyone laughed.

“Now,” the professor said as the laughter subsided. “I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life. The golf balls are the important things. Your family, your children, health, friends and favorite passions. If everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full. The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your house or car. The sand is everything else, the small stuff.

If you put the sand into the jar first,” he continued, “there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls. The same goes for life.

If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff you will never have room for the things that are important to you.

Pay attention to the things critical to your happiness.

Spend time with your children. Spend time with your parents. Visit your grandparents. Take your spouse out for dinner. Go out with your friends. There will always be time to clean the house and mow the lawn.

Take care of the golf balls first, the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand.”

One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the beer represented. The professor smiled and said: “I am glad you asked. The beer just shows that no matter how full your life may seem, there’s always room for a couple of beers with a friend.”

– Author unknown

Namaste.

10 EARLY SIGNS OF DEMENTIA

Hello everyone!

Us here at Bedford Home Instead thought we would kick those Monday Morning blues by giving you some useful information on how to spot the early signs of Dementia. This can come in all shapes and sizes, but here are 10 early symptoms to get you started.

Remember, if you or your loved one is experiencing memory problems, don’t immediately conclude that it’s dementia, a person needs to display at least two types of impairment that significantly interfere with everyday life to receive a dementia diagnosis.

{Just so you know} - in addition to difficulty remembering, the person may also experience impairments in these situations too:

·         Language / Conversation

·         General Communication

·         Focusing on things

·         Reasoning with people

Anyway, without further waffling from us – see below for the 10 Early Signs of Dementia!

1.      SUBTLE SHORT-TERM MEMORY CHANGES

Trouble with memory can be an early symptom of dementia, and it is the most associated symptom. The changes are often subtle and tend to involve short-term memory. An older person may be able to remember events that took place years ago but can’t remember what they had for breakfast. (That’s what we call the Book-Shelf Theory)

Other symptoms of short-term memory changes include forgetting where they left things, struggling to remember why they entered a particular room, or forgetting what they were supposed to do on any given day.

2.      DIFFICULTY FINDING THE RIGHT WORDS

A person with dementia may have difficulty explaining something or finding the right words to express themselves. Having a conversation with a person who has dementia can be quite difficult, and it may take longer than usual to conclude.

3.      CHANGES IN MOOD

If you’ve got dementia, it isn’t always easy to recognize it in yourself, but you may notice this change in someone else. Depression, for instance, is typical of early dementia. Along with mood changes, you might also see a shift in personality. One typical type of personality change seen with dementia is a shift from being shy to outgoing. This is because the condition often affects judgment.

4.      APATHY

Apathy, or listlessness, commonly occurs in early dementia. A person with symptoms could lose interest in hobbies or activities. They may not want to go out anymore or do anything fun. They may lose interest in spending time with friends and family, and they may seem emotionally flat.

5.      DIFFICULTY COMPLETING NORMAL TASKS

A subtle shift in the ability to complete normal tasks may indicate that someone has early dementia. This usually starts with difficulty doing more complex tasks like balancing a notepad or playing games that have a few rules. Along with the struggle to complete familiar tasks, they may struggle to learn how to do new things or follow new routines.

6.      CONFUSION

Someone in the early stages of dementia will often become confused. When memory, thinking, or judgment lapses, confusion may arise as they can no longer remember faces, find the right words, or interact with people normally.

Confusion can occur for a number of reasons and apply to different situations. For example, they may misplace their car keys, forget what comes next in the day, or have difficulty remembering someone they’ve met before.

7.      DIFFICULTY FOLLOWING STORY LINES

Difficulty following storylines may occur due to early dementia. This is a classic early symptom. Just as finding and using the right words becomes difficult, people with dementia sometimes forget the meanings of words they hear or struggles to follow along with conversations or TV programs.

8.      A FAILING SENSE OF DIRECTION

The sense of direction and spatial orientation commonly starts to deteriorate with the onset of dementia. This can mean not recognizing once-familiar landmarks and forgetting regularly used directions. It also becomes more difficult to follow a series of directions and step-by-step instructions.

9.      BEING REPETATIVE

Repetition is common in dementia because of memory loss and general behavioural changes. The person may repeat daily tasks, such as shaving, or they may collect items obsessively. They also may repeat the same questions in a conversation after they’ve been answered.

10.  STRUGGLING TO ADAPT TO CHANGE

For someone in the early stages of dementia, the experience can cause fear. Suddenly, they can’t remember people they know or follow what others are saying. They can’t remember why they went to the shop, and they get lost on the way home. Because of this, they might crave routine and be afraid to try new experiences. Difficulty adapting to change is also a typical symptom of early dementia.

We hope that this had found you helpful, and that you enjoyed reading our top 10 ways to spot early symptoms of Dementia. Remember, every person should display at least 2 types of impairment to receive a dementia diagnosis, but if in doubt – it’s best to check!

Anxeity Explained - A Glass Of Water

I heard this story a few days ago and wanted to share it with you… It is about how Anxiety works, and how it takes over your life, and how you can control it.

A psychologist is giving a talk about Anxiety. She lifts a glass half filled with water and the audience began to wonder if she was going to ask if the glass was half full or half empty. Instead, she asks:

“ What is the weight of this glass half full?”

The audience answers varied from 250g up to 1 kg. After various answers, the psychologist began to talk…

“The weight doesn't matter… But what matter is how long you hold it in your hand. If you hold it for a few minutes there will be no difference, if you hold it for an hour your arm will get sore and start to ache, and if you hold it for a day… You will have sore shoulders, a pain in your back, pins and needles in your arm, and you will begin to feel frustrated and upset. So, the longer you hold on to the glass, the more severe the pain and despair.

This is how anxiety touches our lives. If we think about it for a few minutes and then give it no more thought, it will be OK. 

If we give it deeper thoughts for a longer period of time, it will have an effect on our life, and when we dwell on it, thinking every minute about it, it will consume our whole day and night. 

It will eat us bit by bit, and we will feel like we don't know where to go, or where to turn…

Now, if you have this feeling, or if you’ve had it before… Shift your attention to someone or something that will make you feel thankful for living. If you fill your life with worries and sorrow, then the feeling of thankfulness will disappear. Be thankful for today, be thankful for what you have and be thankful that you have the people closest to you. Concentrate on that. It will lift your spirits and shift your focus to a better place." 

I hope you enjoyed reading that as much as I did, and now you can begin to understand just how anxiety works, and learn some things to help stop it, or calm it down!

Enjoy the rest of your day.

Home Instead Bedford!

Run The Film Backwards - Sydney Carter

This is a poem that all of us here in Bedford love. It is written by a man named Sydney Carter, and although it is already on our website, we thought it only appropriate to share it here too.
We hope you enjoy!

Run The Film Backwards

When I was eighty-seven

they took me from my coffin;

they found a flannel nightshirt

for me to travel off in.

All innocent and toothless

I used to lie in bed,

still trailing clouds of glory

from the time when I was dead.

The cruel age of sixty-five

put paid to my enjoyment;

I had to wear a bowler hat

and go to my employment.

But at the age of sixty

I found I had a wife.

And that explains the children.

(I’d wondered all my life.)

I kept on growing younger

and randier and stronger

Till at the age of twenty-one

I had a wife no longer.

With mini-skirted milkmaids

I frolicked in the clover;

The cuckoo kept on calling me

Until my teens were over.

Then algebra and cricket

And sausages a-cooking,

And puffing at a cigarette

When teacher wasn’t looking.

The trees are getting taller,

The streets are getting wider.

My mother is the world to me;

And soon I’ll be inside her.

And now, it is so early,

There’s nothing I can see.

Before the world, or after?

Wherever can I Be?

Credits to: Sydney Carter

A Warm Welcome from Home Instead Bedford!

Hello, and a very warm welcome! 

Here at Home Instead Senior Care, we are providers of high quality home care services in Bedford and the surrounding villages. We aim to provide high quality and reliable care for older people in their own homes.

Might I take this time to add that we are all extremely passionate about the quality of service we provide, and we like to work on relationship based care. :-)

The office here in Bedford is owned and operated by Moona Karim. Moona has a successful background in the pharmaceutical industry and her experience in Health care allows her to fully understand the needs and challenges that older people face.

 What makes Home Instead Senior Care different from the others?
That's easy - with minimum visits of one hour, we ensure that quality time is spent with the client.
Our CAREGivers encourage, assist and stimulate our clients in a variety of daily activities that help their quality of life and help maintain their independence.
The CAREGiver is introduced to the client and we maintain continuity of CAREGiver-to-client so a relationship is nurtured. All CAREGivers are carefully chosen for their empathy and their caring and respectful approach to the elderly, their reliability and their willingness to match their valuable skills to the clients.

Did you know?
Award winning training is provided for our CAREGivers. Our staff have gone through a rigorous selection process which includes enhanced DBS (criminal background check) and the provision of four references before training begins!

What's the difference between you and other companies?
We are different to many other care companies and agencies in that we will not enter into block contracts with the Local Authority, which forces providers into delivering care in short time periods (even as short as 15 minutes!).
Our care plans are built on the requests of our clients and their families - not just checklists of tasks which need to be carried out. Since 2005 Home Instead Senior Care has grown to more than 175 offices across the UK, which demonstrates that there is a demand for an alternative, flexible type of personal care, which is based on the needs of the individual and that is exactly the kind of service that we deliver.

The Information side of things:
Our office is open on weekdays from 8.30am until 5pm, and you are more than welcome to pay us a visit, or alternatively  we will happily visit you in your own home to carry out a no obligation assessment.
We are also contactable on our main office telephone number – 01234 868820.
If there is anything we can do for you or your family, or for more information on home care in Bedford, please do not hesitate to get in touch.

We look forward to speaking to you soon!

Home Instead Bedford!